Damn presario

[Mercutio]

I have a presario 7599 (p3-700) sitting in my car right now.
Its onboard sound is dead, but not dead enough that Windows can't still detect it via plug and play.

Compaq, in its wisdom, provides no way to disable onboard sound either through the BIOS (I can change it to IRQ 5 or IRQ 9, that's it), or on the board. Every time I disable the onboard sound in Windows, it's detected on reboot.

Install a "real" sound card (AWE64 PCI, a generally good card) in any PCI slot, and the machine hangs. Try to install Windows, the machine hangs. install 2000, machine hangs.

I frickin' hate Compaq.

 

[Tannin]

That may well be the first time I have ever heard the word "Compaq" and the word "wisdom" in the same sentence. Your best bet, Mercutio, would be a Sound Blaster 16 in an ISA slot. If that don't work, nothing will. If the Compaq even has an ISA slot, that is.

 

[Mercutio]

No ISA. Four PCI slots. At this point I think my options are to swap PCI slots to see if any work better for that AWE64, or install Win2000 and hope it works better.

No sound is, of course, completely out of the question.

 

[Mercutio]

Screw it. After three hours of trying to get an AWE64, then a CMI cheapie, to work under 98SE or 2000, I've decided that it's not my problem. All things sound hang that PC.

Who the hell builds integrated boards without an option to turn off the integrated bits?

OK. Don't answer that.

 

[Buck]

Mercutio, why don't you finish the job, and completely destroy the integrated sound chip. That way Windows won't detect it anymore!

 

[Mercutio]

The 7599 is one of those cases that has the entire moreboard obscured by powersupply and/or drive cages. I couldn't see chips on that board with an xray machine.
I told the woman who owns the machine to live with no sound or buy a decent computer.

 

[Buck]

I told the woman who owns the machine to live with no sound or buy a decent computer.

Good for you, I would do the same. I've found that if you tactfully explain the pros and cons of owning a Compaq system and a system that I build, they can see the light (yes, you can make up some pros about Compaq), and recognize that Compaq has too many cons.

 

[Mercutio]

I also spent a little better than an hour today trying to install RAM in a Pavilion 8750. *None* of the "how to open our whack-ass cases" documents on HP's site accurately depicted that particular procedure.

Previous to that, I think it'd been six months or so since the last time I played in a vomit box. Man, I hope that's the last one for a long, long time.

 

[Buck]

I also spent a little better than an hour today trying to install RAM in a Pavilion 8750. *None* of the "how to open our whack-ass cases" documents on HP's site accurately depicted that particular procedure.

Previous to that, I think it'd been six months or so since the last time I played in a vomit box. Man, I hope that's the last one for a long, long time.

If this is not your business (I hope you are profiting somehow), you are quite tolerable to accept these jobs out of simple kindness and generosity.

 

[Mercutio]

It's not my business and there was no profit motive. The woman with the HP now thinks that installing RAM is something that requires an engineering degree and a pair of able-bodied assistants, but IMO that's HP's fault.

 

[Tannin]

.

 

[Tea]

Errr, what was that, Tannin?

 

[Tannin]

My list of Compaq pros.

 

[Buck]

My list of Compaq pros.

The idea is to not make the customer feel stupid, but instead, help them see that an even more intelligent decision would be to buy from me!

 

[time]

Mercutio, it's a while since I've had the misfortune to peek inside a Presario. Do they still use proprietary motherboard mountings etc?

I assume HP uses the same exclusionary tactics with the Pavilion?

 

[Mercutio]

Yes, as nearly as I can tell. The form factor resembled microATX but unless I'm seriously mistaken, it was too long (tall) to fit in a standard mATX case. That, along with the fact that the power supply connector on the board was in an odd place make me think that it was probably still a nonstandard part.

The two Pavilions I looked at today (an 8500 and an 8700) both had Asus system boards and Asus nvidia-based cards, conexant modems, tulip-based NICs, and western digital hard drives. Both were standard mATX. Only their chassis were really retarded. But they were both really, really retarded chassis, lest someone think I'm trying to praise HP.

 

[Dozer]

I recently replaced a power supply for a friend on a Presario. I ordered the correct supply (non-Compaq because it was less expensive), and low and behold, when I went to put the supply in the power plug hole was in the wrong spot!

10 minutes with my Dremel solved that problem in a hurry!

This has got to be the crappiest PC I've ever dealt with!

 

[Tannin]

Olivettis of the 286 and early 386 era were worse. But them aside - and nobody has ever plumbed the depths of vomit quite so successfully as Olivetti used to - yes, they are the crappiest alleged computers ever made.