article by Woody Harrelson; his take on Iraq & war.

[blakerwry]

should be seen as offensive to all Americans, not just the fans of George W Bush.

What is offensive to me is that you act as if you have seen one American you have seen them all. Most people would call that stereotyping or discrimination.

 

[slo crostic]

Sorry if I generalise but I have not yet had the chance to visit the U.S.A. and can therefore merely speak from the point of view of one who watches movies and television on occasion.

 

[Fushigi]

I personally think Shrub is a much less demeaning name than Dubya. The name Dubya is clearly taking the piss out of all Americans for their mispronounciation of the letter W (pronounced double-you) and should be seen as offensive to all Americans, not just the fans of George W Bush.

I'm more offended by Bush/Shrub/Dubya/El Presidente's grasp of American English than I am by any of his nicknames. This was much more apparent before he was elected. He had a real knack for creating words where none existed before, turning nouns into verbs and vice versa, etc. He had difficulty putting together more than one coherent sentence at a time & constantly interrupted himself. Basically, he looked like an idiot whenever he opened his mouth.

And none of it mattered. Thanks to the Supreme Court has was appointed President anyway.

Anyway, his speaking abilities have changed; I presume he has recieved lots of coaching. He also is rather obvious about reading prepared statements vs. winging his statements.

While I'm obviously not a fan of GWB, we should mention that most US presidents have had derogatory nicknames. Tricky Dicky, Slick Willy, the Teflon President, etc.

PS: Fushigi, if by any chance you would like the Alan Jones handle for yourself, let me know and I'll email you the password. I shan't be wanting to use him again.

Oh, that's OK. I don't use my middle name very often. I was mostly surprised to see it, especially with Alan spelled they way I spell it, not "Allen".

- Fushigi

 

[The Giver]

Absolutely Fushigi... we need a smooth talker for President. Wait a minute... we had one didn't we? Yeah that's right we did... only he was Impeached for lying under oath. In fact he later admitted he lied and agreed to pay a fine to avoid criminal prosecution. Hmmm... maybe we shouldn't judge a book by it's cover after all?

Naw... we'd rather have a President who looks good, talks smooth, and who believes in oral sex in the oval office right? Yep that's our kind of guy! Now there's a guy you can trust and believe in! So what if he didn't accomplish a thing in his second term. Didn't even send a single bill to Congress for consideration. He looked good doing it right? That's all that matters. And those sentences he used to compose were classic weren't they? Not like the stumble bum we have now. Remember this beauty? "I did not have sexual relations with that woman!"

 

[Mercutio]

Yup. That's the guy we want. And he can run again in 2004.

 

[Vlad The Impaler]

Flagreen. (Also known as, in various fora, The Giver, Dr Jeckel, Mr Hyde, and Mustafa Hussein

Well. The last three three were a bit obvious, but The Giver is nearly flawless. It is only recently that his statements have been getting a bit suspicious (not to mention insulting! ) I am both impressed and scared at the same time!!

 

[The Giver]

Vlad,

If The Giver writes you a poem will you forgive the perceived offence?

 

[Vlad The Impaler]

Ok then! :mrgrn:

 

[Vlad The Impaler]

By the way; who owns Blue Winter Waves? Or is this guy for real?

 

[SteveC]

By the way; who owns Blue Winter Waves? Or is this guy for real?

I'm pretty sure he's an original, although I could be wrong.

 

[Tannin]

It had occurred to me, because of his extreme right-wing views and willingness to post at length (the word I originally had in mind was actually "lunacy" - however in deference to a civilised tone I decided go with "views") ... it had occurred to me that he was an alias for The Giver. But on a moment's reflection, that cannot possibly be true. Blue Winter Waves has not one tenth of our Bill's subtlty, elegant expression, concern with evidence and reason, sense of fair play, or - something I never thought I would hear myself saying - sense of moderation. I apologise to The Giver for the thought, and hasten to assure him that it was but a momentary aberation.

 

[SteveC]

Sorry if I generalise but I have not yet had the chance to visit the U.S.A. and can therefore merely speak from the point of view of one who watches movies and television on occasion.

Hollywood's portrayal of America is very different from most American's actual experience. For example, from watching police shows, one would get the impression that every cop uses their guns weekly. In reality, 98% of NYPD officers never fire their guns in the line of duty in their entire career.

I'm more offended by Bush/Shrub/Dubya/El Presidente's grasp of American English than I am by any of his nicknames. This was much more apparent before he was elected. He had a real knack for creating words where none existed before, turning nouns into verbs and vice versa, etc. He had difficulty putting together more than one coherent sentence at a time & constantly interrupted himself. Basically, he looked like an idiot whenever he opened his mouth.

Public speaking skills don't translate into one's intelligence or even language skills. When I speak in front of a large group of people, I’m lucky if I remember my name. I quite often do many of those things you describe, but I don’t think it’s a real reflection on my grasp of the English language. Some people are born natural public speakers, while others would rather avoid it at all costs.

Steve

 

[The Giver]

"A young lass met Vlad the Impaler...

She frowned for he swore like a sailor...

Though try as she might...

To set young Vlad right...

Young Vlad was content just to nail her..."

 

[Tannin]

I'd rather eat brains and fried liver
or break down and cry like a river
than ever admit
to liking one bit
that horrible man called The Giver

 

[Jake the Dog]

"A young lass met Vlad the Impaler...

She frowned for he swore like a sailor...

Though try as she might...

To set young Vlad right...

Young Vlad was content just to nail her..."

good one i enjoy a good limerick. Giver, don't know if you know John O'Mills but that is much like his style.

 

[Cliptin]

It had occurred to me,

You've only need ask. Save the world the energy.

 

[Cliptin]

Some people are born natural public speakers, while others would rather avoid it at all costs.

Steve

Some people don't have to try that hard to visualize the audience in their underwear.

 

[The Giver]

I'd rather eat brains and fried liver
or break down and cry like a river
than ever admit
to liking one bit
that horrible man called The Giver

Well done! :lol:

 

[Tannin]

I'm afraid that I could only think of two words that rhymed with "The Giver", Bill, so from there it was purely a matter of trying to figure how on earth I could take "river", "Giver", and "liver" and make some vaguely logical connection between them. Your handle does not leave much room for the aspiring poet! (Is making limerics "poetry"? Perhaps not.) Still, it could be worse. What might one make, in a limmericical sense, of someone called "The Orange"? Not much, I fear.

 

[Ekaf-Ami]

Please, Mr Giver, do not encourage this man (fine gentleman that he be not counting limmericks). I am very much fearing that, unless ignored by all good readers of Storage Forum Forum Forum, will have blood rush to head, swell up like melon in sun, and write more badly poetry like abovementioned.

 

[The Giver]

Whatever the post they are planin'

That Tony, that Tea, or that Tannin

Nothing's for sure

Save one must endure

For it's certain to be damn close to spamin'

 

[The Giver]

I'm afraid that I could only think of two words that rhymed with "The Giver", Bill, so from there it was purely a matter of trying to figure how on earth I could take "river", "Giver", and "liver" and make some vaguely logical connection between them. Your handle does not leave much room for the aspiring poet! (Is making limerics "poetry"? Perhaps not.) Still, it could be worse. What might one make, in a limmericical sense, of someone called "The Orange"? Not much, I fear.

Try "Tannin" some time if you think "The Giver" is hard.

 

[Vlad The Impaler]

Excellent! All is forgiven!

 

[Tannin]

Try "Tannin" some time if you think "The Giver" is hard.

Yike! I see what you mean! Yours is a creative and worthy solution, sir.

 

[Mercutio]

Ahem.

Sin
Win
Gin
Thin
Chin
Skin
Pin.
Bin
Grin
Din

I see a lot to work with there.

I miss the "storage prose" thread on SR.

 

[The Giver]

Why not write a limerick yourself Mercutio? Here's a challenge, write one for Jake the Dog.

 

[Tea]

Now stand aside, you monkeys, while I show you how a real ape does limmericks.

The trouble, Mercutio is that "win" and "thin" don't quite rhyme. It's TAnnin with a soft "i", not tanNIN with a long "i", and probably best written out phonetically as Tan'n. Watch:

There was an old despot called Tannin
with a taste for the tonic and gin.
With ciggies and beers
he wasted the years
Now the evil old bastard can't sin.

Err, the sentiment is good, and it scans well, but it doesn't rhyme properly. Nope, The Giver (fine admirer of great poetry that he is) has the right of it.

 

[Handruin]

Speaking his ways is Mr. Ol' Tannin
postin' tons of words in the database they're a landin'
It's Outlook he doesn't endure
Almost as if Tea didn't have fur
Now it’s time to keep the antivirus scannin'


Logging into the forums I see it is The Giver
Armed with words that'll make the monkey shiver
So what do I do now?
I'll scrunch up my eyebrow
And get a dictionary to show him some eye quiver. :eekers:


:dunno:

 

[Jake the Dog]

my poor efforts:

There once was a cricketer named Tannin
Whose abilities kept his team always a'winnin'
But he gave up the passion
And soon in short fashion
He turned into a busted up has b'n!


The once was debater name The Giver
Whose predicates could bring one to shiver
He could shoot down Jake's words
With a fine use of verbs
Which he was always quick to deliver!


There is a fine man named Mercutio
Who has highest SF posting hit ratio
He can sometimes feel a bit forlorn
So to cheer him let’s talk about porn
I'll start it off and mention fellatio!

(read Merc's profile and check out his interests)

 

[The Giver]

Excellent Jake! :mrgrn:

 

[Mercutio]

... There is absolutely nothing that is going to cheer me up tonight. Amy's current girlfriend - someone I know very little about, let alone her phone number - says she's getting harrassing phone calls, and guess what, *I'm* the chief suspect.

Despite twelve years of friendship, seven of romance, and promises of mutual friendship and trust, I had to return the key to the apartment I once shared with Amy (which, because of her schedule and near-constant trips to see her girlfriend, I still helped to maintain), show her the history on my cell phone and clear out all numbers related to her life tonight. And she won't even apologize for not giving me the benefit of the doubt. I actually think her new girlfriend is making it up, and I fully expect the police will be called. Of course I have nothing to do with it (I think her new kitten is playing with the phone she keeps next to its scratching post), but I also don't have any way to prove it.

Right now I am more depressed than it would be wise to admit in an online forum. I should probably be committed.

 

[P5-133XL]

This thread certainly has gone a long way from Iraq and war. I actually considered trying to create a limerick too: But I know better - that is not in my skill set.

 

[The Grammar Police]

http://www.sfu.ca/~finley/discussion.html

 

[Jake the Dog]

Merc, i don't know what to say really other than to remind you that you have friends here at SF that care about you (and elsewehere i know too).


Mark, c'mon, give it a go. my skills (hah!) at writing a limerick are quite remote from any of my core skills but i gave it go! i would love to see one written by you.

VOTE #1: P5-133XL for limerick writer

 

[Tea]

I second the motion, Sir!

 

[blakerwry]

There once was a ol bloke named Tannin who hailed from Australia
If you forgot a period or left a comma-splice he was sure to nail ya'
While English he could parse
I believe it was all just a farce
Because of his terrible spelling of words like color, memorize and azalea.

 

[The Grammar Police]

Nice one, Blake. Tannin's spelling is legendary. However he does at least get "colour" and "memorise" correct. Like me, he knows that the small dot at the end of a sentence is a "full stop" and that a "period" is a length of time, and he eschews the use of nasty foreign imports from Asia, namely the azelea.

 

[time]

Don't get me started on the use of "s" instead of "z" in words rhyming with "size", such as "realize" and "memorize".

Fact: "z" is correct in both the UK and the US and is the original true spelling. In support of this I quote the Oxford English Dictionary (the exact version I'm checking right now is the legendary Little Oxford, this edition published in 1969).

Somewhere along the way, ignorant twerps in the UK started to use "s" instead of "z", to the extent where the greater population now believes it actually should be "s", and it undoubtedly appears in dictionaries as an alternative spelling.

Australia is small and easily manipulated in this and other regards. The infamous Macquarie dictionary decreed that the Oz spelling was "s", and their vile products have been used by most schools at one time or another.

In addition, the even more infamous News Corp decreed that all their publications would use the "s" spelling, and other media followed, to the extent where we have to comply or appear illiterate.

 

[Tea]

Actually, on the whole I agree with you on the "s" vs "z" thing, Time. Only reason I sometimes remember to avoid using "z" is because the Americans do it that way and it is an article of faith amongst literate, English-speaking people that if the Americans do it it must be wrong. But "z" is a perfectly good letter and is too often neglected. I must try not to throw the baby out with the bathwater quite so often. Calling the standard dictionary "infamous" is a bit much though.

 

[blakerwry]

thanks Tannin