France

[Clocker]

"France has neither winter nor summer nor morals. Apart from these drawbacks it is a fine country. France has usually been governed by prostitutes."
---Mark Twain

"I would rather have a German division in front of me than a French one behind me."
--- General George S. Patton

"Going to war without France is like going deer hunting without your accordion."
--Norman Schwartzkopf

"We can stand here like the French, or we can do something about it."
--- Marge Simpson

"As far as I'm concerned, war always means failure"
---Jacques Chirac, President of France
"As far as France is concerned, you're right."
---Rush Limbaugh,

"The only time France wants us to go to war is when the German Army is sitting in Paris sipping coffee."
--- Regis Philbin

"The French are a smallish, monkey-looking bunch and not dressed any better, on average, than the citizens of Baltimore. True, you can sit outside in Paris and drink little cups of coffee, but why this is more stylish than sitting inside and drinking large glasses of whiskey I don't know."
--- P.J O'Rourke (1989)

"You know, the French remind me a little bit of an aging actress of the 1940s who was still trying to dine out on her looks but doesn't have the face for it."
---John McCain, U.S. Senator from Arizona

"You know why the French don't want to bomb Saddam Hussein? Because he hates America, he loves mistresses and wears a beret. He is French, people."
--Conan O'Brien

"I don't know why people are surprised that France won't help us get Saddam out of Iraq. After all, France wouldn't help us get the Germans out of France!"
---Jay Leno

"The last time the French asked for 'more proof' it came marching into Paris under a German flag."
--David Letterman

How many Frenchmen does it take to change a light bulb?
One. He holds the bulb and all of Europe revolves around him.

Next time there's a war in Europe,




the loser keeps France

 

[Mercutio]

Tell me where, in what country,
Is Flora the beautiful Roman,
Archipiada or Thais
Who was first cousin to her once,
Echo who speaks when there's a sound
On a pond or a river
Whose beauty was more than human?
But where are the snows of yesteryear?
Where is the leamed Heloise
For whom they castrated Pierre Abelard
And made him a monk at Saint-Denis,
For his love he took this pain,
Likewise where is the queen
Who commanded that Buridan
Be thrown in a sack into the Seine?
But where are the snows of yesteryear?

The queen white as a lily
Who sang with a siren's voice,
Big-footed Bertha, Beatrice, Alice,
Haremburgis who held Maine
And Jeanne the good maid of Lorraine
Whom the English bumt at Rouen, where,
Where are they, sovereign Virgin?
But where are the snows of yesteryear?

Prince, don't ask me in a week
or in a year what place they are;
I can only give you this refrain:
Where are the snows of yesteryear?

 

[CougTek]

What's that Clocker? A collection of the most narrow-minded American public personalities?

Besides, laughing of France because they weren't able to resist the Germans during WWII is silly. No one here was born when that war ended. The world has changed a lot since.

Not that they don't usually fall on my nerves with their accent, but you can't judge someone by his apparent charisma. I try to concentrate on the message rather than on the way it is presented. And no matter how annoying the French might be, their messages sometimes worth listening.

 

[Clocker]

I just got that in an e-mail...thought it would spark some discussion.... :mrgrn:

C

 

[Mercutio]

Much of great Western Thought (Voltaire, Balzac) has come from France, as has Great Art (too many to name, but of course it birthed impressionism in art and music). Some of America's greats have chosen the Sienne over our own shores. Hemingway, F Scott Fitzgerald, Benjamin Franklin, Jim Morrison (if you're into that sort of thing)...

France jokes are funny for a couple of seconds, but they saved our ass in a certain revolution we had, and gifted us with the symbol of liberty that guards our shores (a gift given by public donations by ordinary Frenchmen, I might add).

What have they done for us lately? Well, the bikini (surely a reason to keep living!) is a Gallic invention, and hey, don't laugh too loud, but I understand that practices in the brothels of WWII Paris led to gradual, general acceptance in the US of certain fun bedroom activities after servicemen got home from the Europe.

And of course there are things like the beautiful words I posted above (written in the 15th Century by a man who was imprisoned for killing a priest, but hey, nobody's perfect), or the music of Debussey...

 

[blakerwry]

I agree that some people have recently been too critical of France

 

[NRG = mc²]

Well its definately better than England (hey at least they have some sun over there, at least in the south) so I won't speak. The ladies are also very nice compared to our rubbish :wink:

 

[fool]

Clocker forgot one

" The problem with the French is that they have no word for entrepreneur"
G.W. Bush

Kind of says all you need to know about his list IMO.

Mind you I don't see how can France be better than England when they can't make a proper cup of tea.

 

[Kofi Annan]

I was in France a while back. I toured Disney while I was there. Ahhh ... that Minnie Mouse with a cigarette hanging from her lip and hairy legs my friend she was magnifique mon ami... magnifique!

 

[Tannin]

George S. Patton had a genius for two things: (a) war, and (b) saying extremely unkind things about everyone except himself. Remarkably like a certain arch-rival known as Monty, in fact.

Still, we should remember that the French have also, from time to time, been magnificent soldiers. The Revolutianary Wars, then under Napoleon, the First World War, where France shed the blood of its young men in numbers that made the losses of any other Allied nation look like small change. It's no wonder they didn't do too well in WW2: all of the belligerant ones were already dead in the previous war! (This, by the way, is a fairly consistent pattern of history: where a nation has a particularly nasty war, with really bad losses, it tends to shy away from the next one. Sure, there are exceptions, and sometimes it takes two wars in a row, but it's the general pattern. Consider the tardy US involvement in WW1. Why? Because the memory of the terrible US Civil War was still strong.)

Sure, the French are arrogant as all hell - and achieving that distinction in the same world as the British, the Germans and the Americans is not an easy task! - and notoriously selfish. But they make a habit of telling the Yanks where to get off, so they can't be all bad!

 

[blakerwry]

Clocker forgot one

" The problem with the French is that they have no word for entrepreneur"
G.W. Bush

Kind of says all you need to know about his list IMO.

Mind you I don't see how can France be better than England when they can't make a proper cup of tea.

They dont have brownies either.... they dont even know what they are...

 

[timwhit]

Clocker forgot one

" The problem with the French is that they have no word for entrepreneur"
G.W. Bush

Kind of says all you need to know about his list IMO.

Mind you I don't see how can France be better than England when they can't make a proper cup of tea.

They dont have brownies either.... they dont even know what they are...

Or peanut butter, but half the world doesn't either. How can you not like peanut butter????

 

[fool]

Still, we should remember that the French have also, from time to time, been magnificent soldiers. The Revolutianary Wars, then under Napoleon, the First World War, where France shed the blood of its young men in numbers that made the losses of any other Allied nation look like small change. It's no wonder they didn't do too well in WW2: all of the belligerant ones were already dead in the previous war! (This, by the way, is a fairly consistent pattern of history: where a nation has a particularly nasty war, with really bad losses, it tends to shy away from the next one. Sure, there are exceptions, and sometimes it takes two wars in a row, but it's the general pattern. Consider the tardy US involvement in WW1. Why? Because the memory of the terrible US Civil War was still strong.)

Very true. Which incidentally was one of the strongest motivations behind the appeasement policy followed by Britain and France in the thirtys.

 

[its.fubar]

Still, we should remember that the French have also, from time to time, been magnificent soldiers. The Revolutianary Wars, then under Napoleon, the First World War, where France shed the blood of its young men in numbers that made the losses of any other Allied nation look like small change. It's no wonder they didn't do too well in WW2: all of the belligerant ones were already dead in the previous war! (This, by the way, is a fairly consistent pattern of history: where a nation has a particularly nasty war, with really bad losses, it tends to shy away from the next one. Sure, there are exceptions, and sometimes it takes two wars in a row, but it's the general pattern. Consider the tardy US involvement in WW1. Why? Because the memory of the terrible US Civil War was still strong.)

Very true. Which incidentally was one of the strongest motivations behind the appeasement policy followed by Britain and France in the thirtys.

I had no idea that was the reason for The French not wishing to participate in the signing of a UN document, starting a one sided conclusion against Iraq.
how could you not expect them tobe nothing but happy and receptive to all plans about the coming slaughter because Have no illusions it will be a slaughter.And correct me if I'm wrong are you suggesting because the french will not sign ww3 will begin?

 

[EdwardK]

Well its definately better than England (hey at least they have some sun over there, at least in the south) so I won't speak. The ladies are also very nice compared to our rubbish :wink:

Well...can I add something: the English ladies (those I socialise with, anyway) can drink me under the table. :wink:

Cheers,
Edward

 

[fool]

...5...6...7...8...9...10.

Fubar,
I quoted tannins post then I said
Very true. Which incidentally was one of the strongest motivations behind the appeasement policy followed by Britain and France in the thirtys.

Quite how you took this to mean anything about my opinion of the current French position with regard to a second UN resolution, I don't know.

I meant the 1930's.

 

[its.fubar]

...5...6...7...8...9...10.

Fubar,
I quoted tannins post then I said
Very true. Which incidentally was one of the strongest motivations behind the appeasement policy followed by Britain and France in the thirtys.

Quite how you took this to mean anything about my opinion of the current French position with regard to a second UN resolution, I don't know.

I meant the 1930's.

Okay I will try to explain to you
the connection I made was as simple as this "if they were stupid then they must be stupid now " and their policies and politics must be the same.

 

[fool]

Okay I will try to explain to you
the connection I made was as simple as this "if they were stupid then they must be stupid now " and their policies and politics must be the same.

Thank you so much for explaining this to me, I can honestly say I never would have guessed that I really said that


I’m careful about what I post.
I didn’t, and wouldn’t, say the policy was stupid. Misguided? Yes, incredibly costly? Certainly, just plain wrong? Obviously. But stupid? No .
If you read the post of tannins which I quoted it is in no way derogatory to the French. The first statement I made following the quote should tell you that I was agreeing with tannin. A sentiment which would, I should have thought, lead you to doubt that I would then say something as outrageous as that which you inferred.
Furthermore in both posts I mentioned France and Britain, the governments of which have adopted clearly different positions over the current Iraq issue. If I am to be credited with any intelligence whatsoever then why would I mention both in the context you posit?