Mercutio
Fatwah on Western Digital
I participated in a Google usability study today. I can't discuss anything specific that I saw, but it was a fascinating process.
Something Random
- Thread starter ddrueding
- Start date
time
Storage? I am Storage!
Is that a pun?
And have you of all people become too careful with money to employ a cabinetmaker?
time
Storage? I am Storage!
I may be hopelessly cynical, but from my perspective, a Google usability study would be a hopeless use case.
Mercutio
Fatwah on Western Digital
All I can say is that it was fascinating. I got a unique peek behind the curtain. If you ever have the opportunity, it's a worthwhile experience.
ddrueding
Fixture
I have three great cabinetmakers. This is mainly because I want to give it a go. Though it would probably be $20k+ in total for the cabinetry I'm after, and I am careful with that kind of money.
CougTek
Hairy Aussie
No. I typically use my boots or a sledgehammer.
Mercutio
Fatwah on Western Digital
I've long maintained that their only worthwhile purpose is as very expensive construction material.
sedrosken
Florida Man
So this is a thing now. My parents are splitting up.
A bit of background: I live with my dad and step-mom, whom I refer to as my mother for all intents and purposes. My real mother is really nothing more than the egg donor for me. My dad and I left her when I was 5 and the last time I even visited her was over six years ago, though the usually 200-300 miles separating us doesn't really help with that.
Apparently my dad and step-mom have been having issues behind the scenes for a while now. See, that's how you handle marital problems -- you don't involve your children in them if you can avoid it.
We moved up to Michigan (from Kentucky) with her a couple years back, as our financial situation was nearing critical and her parents had space and money to spare. My dad is on disability -- it's ridiculously difficult for just one person to live off of that, and impossible for a family of four.
It all came to a head about this past Wednesday. I had fallen ill with some kind of stomach bug (that I'm still not completely recovered from) and they had an argument after we were supposed to have gone to bed (I was up because puking). She left, over to her parents' house (we live next door to them, in case I've never mentioned it). So, you know, perfect timing. This week has been just completely spectacular.
I learn from them that they're splitting up. Dad's heading back to Kentucky (and I immediately elected to go with him -- he is the only one who's stuck with me through everything and the family is MUCH more familiar down there). I dropped out of the early college program because it's too expensive gas-wise -- every single day is roundabout a hundred miles after everything is said and done. It's a shame, with two weeks to go, and while I didn't have to, I felt that it was the best decision. I would have had to go back to finish out my senior year even if I HAD finished this semester. The good news is that all I have to go back to high school for is my senior year. It puts me back on the original track for graduation. Because I've already learned most of what they're going to be teaching in the senior-level classes, I can pass them with ease and focus on self-teaching some basics of certain programming languages. I got a 32 composite score on my ACT test that I took back in March, with not a single subscore below 30 (for perspective for those not in the US -- 36 is a perfect score. The national average composite score is 25 IIRC, with Michigan's average being 20), meaning I can go literally wherever I want to for college, and probably even still have everything financially covered. Because I'm in a decidedly low-income situation, I also qualify for a metric ton of grants on top of the scholarships I'm probably going to end up with. All in all, early college or no my future is still looking very bright.
It's kind of depressing how women in my dad's life always seem to come and go, though.
I actually cooked dinner for us yesterday. I didn't do too bad. It was certainly edible.
A bit of background: I live with my dad and step-mom, whom I refer to as my mother for all intents and purposes. My real mother is really nothing more than the egg donor for me. My dad and I left her when I was 5 and the last time I even visited her was over six years ago, though the usually 200-300 miles separating us doesn't really help with that.
Apparently my dad and step-mom have been having issues behind the scenes for a while now. See, that's how you handle marital problems -- you don't involve your children in them if you can avoid it.
We moved up to Michigan (from Kentucky) with her a couple years back, as our financial situation was nearing critical and her parents had space and money to spare. My dad is on disability -- it's ridiculously difficult for just one person to live off of that, and impossible for a family of four.
It all came to a head about this past Wednesday. I had fallen ill with some kind of stomach bug (that I'm still not completely recovered from) and they had an argument after we were supposed to have gone to bed (I was up because puking). She left, over to her parents' house (we live next door to them, in case I've never mentioned it). So, you know, perfect timing. This week has been just completely spectacular.
I learn from them that they're splitting up. Dad's heading back to Kentucky (and I immediately elected to go with him -- he is the only one who's stuck with me through everything and the family is MUCH more familiar down there). I dropped out of the early college program because it's too expensive gas-wise -- every single day is roundabout a hundred miles after everything is said and done. It's a shame, with two weeks to go, and while I didn't have to, I felt that it was the best decision. I would have had to go back to finish out my senior year even if I HAD finished this semester. The good news is that all I have to go back to high school for is my senior year. It puts me back on the original track for graduation. Because I've already learned most of what they're going to be teaching in the senior-level classes, I can pass them with ease and focus on self-teaching some basics of certain programming languages. I got a 32 composite score on my ACT test that I took back in March, with not a single subscore below 30 (for perspective for those not in the US -- 36 is a perfect score. The national average composite score is 25 IIRC, with Michigan's average being 20), meaning I can go literally wherever I want to for college, and probably even still have everything financially covered. Because I'm in a decidedly low-income situation, I also qualify for a metric ton of grants on top of the scholarships I'm probably going to end up with. All in all, early college or no my future is still looking very bright.
It's kind of depressing how women in my dad's life always seem to come and go, though.
I actually cooked dinner for us yesterday. I didn't do too bad. It was certainly edible.
ddrueding
Fixture
Rough times, sedrosken. I can't provide much advice, my parents are still together, I was out of the house at about your age, and quit college after 6 weeks (when the first bill arrived, "fail fast, fail often").
Best advice I can give is to get your situation/future identified, organized, and settled as quickly as possible. This should make things easier for your dad for whatever he has coming (work, relationships, whatever). And if your relationship with your dad is anything like mine, it became much better/more open as soon as we weren't under the same roof or pulling money from the same account.
Best advice I can give is to get your situation/future identified, organized, and settled as quickly as possible. This should make things easier for your dad for whatever he has coming (work, relationships, whatever). And if your relationship with your dad is anything like mine, it became much better/more open as soon as we weren't under the same roof or pulling money from the same account.
Mercutio
Fatwah on Western Digital
I'm sorry to hear that, sed. Especially that you've done the work in your college prep courses but that you won't be getting the credit for them.
If there's any bright side to this, it's that you're nearly in a place where you can become independent anyway. You only have to put up with another year or so of whatever chaos and drama is coming from that part of your life before you're an adult and able to remove yourself from it if you so choose.
Do you have any idea where you're going to wind up as far as school?
If there's any bright side to this, it's that you're nearly in a place where you can become independent anyway. You only have to put up with another year or so of whatever chaos and drama is coming from that part of your life before you're an adult and able to remove yourself from it if you so choose.
Do you have any idea where you're going to wind up as far as school?
CougTek
Hairy Aussie
Not much advices to give, since the world was quite different when I was your age and that I wasn't in the same country. However, from what I read, the student grants situation has gone to shit during the past decade in the U.S.A. Limit yourself on that front the more you can. They seem to be a bitch to repay.
Santilli is having problems with that IIRC.
Santilli is having problems with that IIRC.
Chewy509
Wotty wot wot.
@Sed, sorry to hear the news. Can't provide much advice, however having witness my ex-wife's parents go through a divorce, and having been divorced myself, but the best things to do is to keep an open mind and take everything said about the relationship (and especially why it failed) with a huge grain of salt. You'll hear a lot of crap from all different sources...
I saw my ex-wife basically disown her own father (and taking her mum's side in everything) when her parents split up, and to be honest, their separation from my perspective and what I saw first hand was about 70% her mum's fault. (She was very controlling and abusive if things didn't go her way). My ex-wife failed to see any wrong doing on her mum's part... (this also affected our relationship, and was one of the reasons we split up).
As Dave said, "get your situation/future identified, organized, and settled"...
I saw my ex-wife basically disown her own father (and taking her mum's side in everything) when her parents split up, and to be honest, their separation from my perspective and what I saw first hand was about 70% her mum's fault. (She was very controlling and abusive if things didn't go her way). My ex-wife failed to see any wrong doing on her mum's part... (this also affected our relationship, and was one of the reasons we split up).
As Dave said, "get your situation/future identified, organized, and settled"...
ddrueding
Fixture
Apparently some women really don't like being called by the wrong name.
This should only matter if you are in a new-ish relationship with them at the time.
sedrosken
Florida Man
I'm not really all that upset. It's par for the course for me at this point. Their marriage has only lasted about five and a half years. Like I said, women have come and gone through my dad's life.
Just an FYI, there is no possible way my dad is going to be working -- he has Parkinson's Dystonia. There is no cure and it is very permanent. He can drive, but to be perfectly honest if I could drive I'd be doing that for him too. Thankfully his variant isn't progressive -- he's in the same condition now that he was ten or twenty years ago, with the exception of being older. And with the genetic lottery of this family, either I or my children are going to end up with it later in life. So, fun fun.
I'm not really upset, and I'm actually feeling pretty good about myself and where I'm heading. I'm going back home, for one. Never really felt like I belonged up here. I know I should get my life in order, but I'm not all that sure about leaving Dad on his own. He can handle himself just fine, I'm sure, but I'm just really uneasy about being on my own.
Probably University of Kentucky. It's within reasonable distance to where I'm going to be living and it has a decent network administration program from what I've heard.
My relationship with my dad has always been really open. I tell him everything, he doesn't tell me EVERYTHING but enough for me to piece together what else is happening. What he doesn't tell me is usually not my business, so that's alright by me.
Just an FYI, there is no possible way my dad is going to be working -- he has Parkinson's Dystonia. There is no cure and it is very permanent. He can drive, but to be perfectly honest if I could drive I'd be doing that for him too. Thankfully his variant isn't progressive -- he's in the same condition now that he was ten or twenty years ago, with the exception of being older. And with the genetic lottery of this family, either I or my children are going to end up with it later in life. So, fun fun.
I'm not really upset, and I'm actually feeling pretty good about myself and where I'm heading. I'm going back home, for one. Never really felt like I belonged up here. I know I should get my life in order, but I'm not all that sure about leaving Dad on his own. He can handle himself just fine, I'm sure, but I'm just really uneasy about being on my own.
Probably University of Kentucky. It's within reasonable distance to where I'm going to be living and it has a decent network administration program from what I've heard.
My relationship with my dad has always been really open. I tell him everything, he doesn't tell me EVERYTHING but enough for me to piece together what else is happening. What he doesn't tell me is usually not my business, so that's alright by me.
jtr1962
Storage? I am Storage!
I can give you two bits of advice. One is to do as much as you can with your life as soon as you can. Given the condition which runs in your family, if you don't start a career and earn a decent amount by your 30s or 40s, you may never have the chance again. I know this because I was afflicted with severe CTS by my late 20s, to the point I could no longer work full time. It runs in my family. My mom went out on permanent disability due to CTS by her mid 40s but frankly she was in a bad state long before that. I've managed to get by since working at home running my electronics business but the income has generally never been enough to think about living on my own (i.e. my income is low enough to qualify for EIC most of the time). In the last year I've had a bit of luck falling in with a nice consulting gig where I'll be earning six figures for as long as it lasts working ~20 hours per week on average. Really, this is about the only bit of really good luck I've had in my life in a long time. Anyway, my advice is to earn as much as you can and save as much as you can. I did save a good amount of what I've earned through the years, and I'm saving practically everything I'm making now.
Two, if you feel comfortable staying with your dad and it's mutally beneficial for the two of you to remain together, don't feel any pressure to get your own place, ever. Strictly speaking, I never left my parents. My dad died in 2006. Lately I've been a caretaker for mom given that her mental state isn't what it used to be but that's OK. My parents supported me all my life, so I just see this as repaying a debt. To be honest, the situation of adult children remaining with their parents into their 30s, 40s, and beyond isn't that uncommon in NYC due to the high housing costs. Next door the two adult children, both in their 40s, are still with their parents. Nothing wrong with it. In fact, there are many Asians in the area and it's normal in an Asian family for the children to remain with their parents until they get married, regardless of the age that occurs. Extended families are the way mankind has lived for most of its existence. It's only in the US that we often attach a stigma to it. Anyway, don't feel pressured to be on your own by 18, or 21, or any other arbitrary age. In a way, by not sharing living expenses with other people you only spite yourself. You can't save as much money, if you can save anything at all. You don't have anyone to pick up the slack, do things like buy groceries, if you fall ill for a while. There is no emotional support system living alone.
That's probably all the advice I can give. Oh, and I echo Coug's advice-DO NOT take out student loans. Grants and scholarships are fine but you don't want to start your working life with $50K or $100K of debt. Hopefully there will be reform allowing student loans to be discharged in bankruptcy, and also laws to end predatory practices like applying high collection fees and not applying any payments to principal until interest is fully paid off. Until then, don't touch student loans with a ten foot pole. If you can't get a job right after school, and they go into default, the amount owed can double or triple virtually overnight, ensuring you'll be living a life of indentured servitude. I don't see how this is legal but apparently it is.
Two, if you feel comfortable staying with your dad and it's mutally beneficial for the two of you to remain together, don't feel any pressure to get your own place, ever. Strictly speaking, I never left my parents. My dad died in 2006. Lately I've been a caretaker for mom given that her mental state isn't what it used to be but that's OK. My parents supported me all my life, so I just see this as repaying a debt. To be honest, the situation of adult children remaining with their parents into their 30s, 40s, and beyond isn't that uncommon in NYC due to the high housing costs. Next door the two adult children, both in their 40s, are still with their parents. Nothing wrong with it. In fact, there are many Asians in the area and it's normal in an Asian family for the children to remain with their parents until they get married, regardless of the age that occurs. Extended families are the way mankind has lived for most of its existence. It's only in the US that we often attach a stigma to it. Anyway, don't feel pressured to be on your own by 18, or 21, or any other arbitrary age. In a way, by not sharing living expenses with other people you only spite yourself. You can't save as much money, if you can save anything at all. You don't have anyone to pick up the slack, do things like buy groceries, if you fall ill for a while. There is no emotional support system living alone.
That's probably all the advice I can give. Oh, and I echo Coug's advice-DO NOT take out student loans. Grants and scholarships are fine but you don't want to start your working life with $50K or $100K of debt. Hopefully there will be reform allowing student loans to be discharged in bankruptcy, and also laws to end predatory practices like applying high collection fees and not applying any payments to principal until interest is fully paid off. Until then, don't touch student loans with a ten foot pole. If you can't get a job right after school, and they go into default, the amount owed can double or triple virtually overnight, ensuring you'll be living a life of indentured servitude. I don't see how this is legal but apparently it is.
Stereodude
Not really a
That all depends on the context...Apparently some women really don't like being called by the wrong name.
Stereodude
Not really a
Sorry to hear about your family life problems Sed...
Howell
Storage? I am Storage!
Good to see you still have your head up sed.
ddrueding
Fixture
Welcome sticktrip! Considering your first posts, I'm presuming you've been lurking for a while?
timwhit
Hairy Aussie
You're not interested in Computer Science?
mubs
Storage? I am Storage!
Sed, hang in there. You're a smart kid, and seem to know your priorities. I'm sure you'll do just fine.
Mercutio
Fatwah on Western Digital
I'd suggest something like statistics or accounting that's applicable to a lot of roles. You can prove you're a qualified IT person with professional certifications if you feel the need and the tech they'll teach you at a four year school will probably be outdated and/or not relevant to the market by the time you finish an IT Management or Computer Information Systems program.
Bartender
Storage is cool
Hi Sed,
I am sorry to read about your situation. You do explain it in a somewhat optimistic way, which is good. I think that maybe because of earlier experiences in life, this situation is less traumatic for you than it would be for others. But if the situation really depresses you at some point, please feel free to express it here. There are many good people here that can help, sympathize, and just want to listen.
I am sorry to read about your situation. You do explain it in a somewhat optimistic way, which is good. I think that maybe because of earlier experiences in life, this situation is less traumatic for you than it would be for others. But if the situation really depresses you at some point, please feel free to express it here. There are many good people here that can help, sympathize, and just want to listen.
Mercutio
Fatwah on Western Digital
Truth.
ddrueding
Fixture
I've gotten a few of those here, actually. Someone revives a thread years old and their first post is "did you get this working?". Usually, "nope" is the answer in such cases.
timwhit
Hairy Aussie
Computer science is one of those degrees where the things you learn are never outdated. Unless you go to a school with a bad program that teaches programming languages and syntax rather than algorithms and data structures.
Mercutio
Fatwah on Western Digital
I was a CS major also, but it doesn't sound like sed would want to be one. I liked the classroom work a lot more than I liked the reality of being a working developer myself. I put myself through a lot of misery for a degree that, while I appreciate it, I also don't use to any appreciable degree. Business Computing, IT Management or whatever they're calling the business or trade-school program definitely WILL teach skills that will become outdated.
In my particular case, I wish I had studied music. I think it would've been a much more gratifying experience.
jtr1962
Storage? I am Storage!
My niece is graduating with a combined music/education degree from CW Post next week. No idea what she'll eventually be doing (most likely teaching music) but she seemed to enjoy the process of getting a degree.
ddrueding
Fixture
Looking at the lives of my friends with such degrees (music, art, lit, history, education), it seems just a little more useful to their career than if they had spent all that time and money learning scotch or golf. A long, very expensive vacation that they somehow managed to finance with the government and that they'll be paying off for decades. Nice if you have the cash, but there is no way I'd consider it helping your career in the way STEM programs are.
Stereodude
Not really a
But you'd have a degree that doesn't let you find a job within your major unless you're interested in playing an instrument in an orchestra or band.
Mercutio
Fatwah on Western Digital
General IT is weird in that area since the skills that make a person useful aren't easily developed from an academic curriculum . Which is why someone like dd can be a great IT guy with no academic background but tons of people with Master's degrees in IT management can barely do anything but function as a cog in bureaucracy. A CS degree in particular is just a ticket past an HR drone that is convinced that the most "computer-y" sounding degree is what IT people need.
I've personally found it useful to work through a general IT position into a computer engineering role throughout the years. This has given me a better appreciation, understanding, and exposure to the various levels and components in computer system environments. Finding that kind of training in a university is difficult so I agree with you there. This may not be what other people are interested in. I have worked with numerous people over the years that want nothing to do with the hardware side and just spend their time coding/developing. What I've always found bizarre in that situation is how one develops for a platform they don't want to manage or understand.
I've found through various forums, reading, and exposure that the tech-related job positions that could be in-demand in the next 5-10 years will be those of data-analytics and machine-learning.
I've found through various forums, reading, and exposure that the tech-related job positions that could be in-demand in the next 5-10 years will be those of data-analytics and machine-learning.
Mercutio
Fatwah on Western Digital
There's probably still a lot of money to be made in commoditizing analytics (and then turning it in to something an MBA can use the pivot table function in Excel to manipulate so they can feel like they contributed to the process). Machine Learning is something that's been "Any Day Now" probably since the 1980s.
Statistics, Actuarial Science, "Hard" Econ, CS and more or less anything else that involves taking three math classes per semester are probably some of the best general purpose educational backgrounds for the long term, but there's a reason why people aren't lining up to become actuaries. Accounting is probably another good and safe choice and I suspect it's quite a bit easier from an academic perspective. I'm told that there are fewer options available for those who specialize in finance, which sounds like it would be another good option, unless one's degree is from a top-rated program.
Statistics, Actuarial Science, "Hard" Econ, CS and more or less anything else that involves taking three math classes per semester are probably some of the best general purpose educational backgrounds for the long term, but there's a reason why people aren't lining up to become actuaries. Accounting is probably another good and safe choice and I suspect it's quite a bit easier from an academic perspective. I'm told that there are fewer options available for those who specialize in finance, which sounds like it would be another good option, unless one's degree is from a top-rated program.
time
Storage? I am Storage!
I suspect I would have liked being an actuary.
I'm a bit late in replying but let me say now that I'm sorry you have to deal with this now, right when things were starting to come together for you. But I have no worries that you will survive this and thrive.
My parents should have gotten a divorce 15 to 20 years, YEARS, before they did and living with that is not healthy. The "saying together for the kids" argument is mostly crap, as the toxic atmosphere is usually worse then any benefit gained by them staying together.
You are still young and have a long and bright future ahead.
And let me echo what was said by the others above......STAY AWAY from any and all student loans. They are the devil and a huge scam. If you must take them, keep the amount as low as possible and pay them off ASAP.
sedrosken
Florida Man
Thanks for the advice and support, guys. We made it into Kentucky last night, around 2 AM. We were aiming to avoid the Derby traffic.
From your advice, I've decided to instead pursue a degree in computer science as so many of you have.
Things are finally looking up. I'm home again.
From your advice, I've decided to instead pursue a degree in computer science as so many of you have.
Things are finally looking up. I'm home again.