Tea threatened that I would have something to say on this theme a few posts and a couple of days ago.
Parties are horrible things a lot of the time. It isn't that there is anything wrong with the idea of a party as such, rather, it's that in the vast majority of cases, the majority of other people at the party are people that, when it's all said and done, you don't particlarly like. I'm not saying that there is anything wrong with these people, or that you don't get along with them perfectly well, just that 95% of the people you meet at the average party are people you really have nothing much in common with and talk to out of politeness more than genuine interest.
So you float around feeling like a fool because all the brainless (er, sorry, make that "differently interested" instead of "brainless") party people, and wind up having a really hard time thinking of anything to say to them. In the end, you either find a quiet corner and get into a good conversation with somebody interesting (if you are lucky) or, more frequently, wind up running out of sensible things to say to these people that you don't particularly get on a wavelength with, so you say some stupid things instead, and live to regret it.
(So, Tannin, how many of those "stupid" people you meet at parties and don't like are actually rather nice people who have, like you, simply run out of sensible things to say to people they don't particularly know or like and are - like you - now saying stupid things which they will live to regret?)
(Good question, Tea. Your point seems to be that one should not rush to judge. I'll try to bear that in mind in future.)
Or else, having nothing more interesting to do but feeling the need for some activity, you drink more than is good for you, and allow the evening to progress (regress?) from there.
Finally, parties are nearly always dominated by loud music. Now don't get me wrong, I like music, and if it's good music, I like it loud. (Scratch an old rock and roller.) (Or scratch a concert goer who really, really likes small halls and doesn't much like to see (e.g.) Mozart in the vast emptiness of Hamer Hall (the main Melbourne concert hall) because it's just not loud enough. In a big hall, anything less than 100-odd musicians is a bit underwhelming.)
But I don't like trying to mix music and conversation. Doesn't work. OK, some people are really tuned in to body language and various other visual cues when they talk to one another. I ain't. I tune into auditory cues. Always have. This is why I sell so many computers on the telephone: it doesn't worry me in the slightest that I can't see the other person, I can learn all I need to know from their phrasing, timing, tone of voice. And I don't miss visual cues in the slightest, because I never see them anyway, not even when I'm talking face-to-face.
But put me in a room full of people and loud music, and I become a social cripple. I can't communicate. I can't figure out what people are communicating to me. You might as well put me in a room of people who all speak Hindustani. (In fact, I'd do better: I might not understand any of the words, but I'd soon figure out the other stuff, that 70% of human communication which (psychologists tell us) is non-verbal.)
This is why I don't like parties.
(Unless I'm doing something I like. Such as cook. Or play bass guitar.)
What if the party was all people I actually liked? People I thought were really interesting? Hmmmm ...... Never been to a party like that. But then, most of the people I like don't usually go to parties.
Finally, parties happen on weekends. Nearly always, it's a Friday night or a Saturday night. Nine Friday nights out of ten, I'm on the road heading for some wildlife. Nine Saturday nights out of ten, I'm looking up at the stars and having one more cup of tea before I turn the lantern out and roll over and pull the tarp up over my head because tommorow is another day and I want to be up in time to hear the first bird call.
(Tannin, you know what?)
(Nope. What?)
(You are off-topic.)
(I'm practically always off-topic, Tea.)
(Yes, but this might be a good time to stop and post in some other thread instead.)
(You are probably right. I think I'll do that.)
(Now Tannin.)
(OK)