Wish me luck
- Thread starter Mercutio
- Start date
Mercutio
Fatwah on Western Digital
In this particular case, I don't think anyone meant any harm. We had been getting along very well and then one of them said something that for them was a very happy thing and for me is absolutely devastating on many, many levels.
Now I am a bad person (to them) for being upset about it, and to myself because it's not something I have any right feel bad about, which of course feeds back into everything else.
Now I am a bad person (to them) for being upset about it, and to myself because it's not something I have any right feel bad about, which of course feeds back into everything else.
ddrueding
Fixture
It has always been my opinion that having an emotion or feeling about something is nothing to be ashamed of; that it's an inherent part of being human. It sounds like you are aware why you are having these feelings, and I'd guess that they should understand the source as well. I might suggest that they're mentioning something that would cause this reaction was insensative of them in the first place. Even if mentioning it was OK, they should be understanding of your response.
Mercutio
Fatwah on Western Digital
Been spending a great deal of time with both of them lately. A couple nights a week, a whole day on a weekend. We meet and shop for groceries or books, or watch movies. Whatever. It adds up to me being on SF less than usual but at the same time it makes me feel much, much better about life.
A couple weeks ago we ran LAN cable for their PCs, and set up a proper home theater in their cavernous living room (projector and a 20' screen good, but the sound from the TV? It had to be fixed!). We're building a MAME cabinet right now since both of them are console junkies and the only thing that tops PS2 on a projector is "Joust" on a standup.
I keep meaning to take pictures but I was really surprised how easy the assembly was. They both know much more about the carpentry and finishing work that needs to be done than I do... but there's a functional P3/1.3GHz inside an old arcade machine, ready to go to work once we figure out how to handle arcade controls.
So last night the issue of Thanksgiving came up. Not "what are you doing for thanksgiving" but "when should be have our dinner?" And that's amazing to me. It's not even a question of whether or not I am welcome. We're making plans together. It's wonderful.
A couple weeks ago we ran LAN cable for their PCs, and set up a proper home theater in their cavernous living room (projector and a 20' screen good, but the sound from the TV? It had to be fixed!). We're building a MAME cabinet right now since both of them are console junkies and the only thing that tops PS2 on a projector is "Joust" on a standup.
I keep meaning to take pictures but I was really surprised how easy the assembly was. They both know much more about the carpentry and finishing work that needs to be done than I do... but there's a functional P3/1.3GHz inside an old arcade machine, ready to go to work once we figure out how to handle arcade controls.
So last night the issue of Thanksgiving came up. Not "what are you doing for thanksgiving" but "when should be have our dinner?" And that's amazing to me. It's not even a question of whether or not I am welcome. We're making plans together. It's wonderful.
ddrueding
Fixture
Congratulations, Merc. That sounds great. The holidays are always a tough time to be alone, which is usually the case for me, and having something to be a part of is wonderful.
Wishing you the best.
Wishing you the best.
Will Rickards
Storage Is My Life
Enjoy the turkey, or lasagna or whatever you eat on thanksgiving.
I hope you practice the tradition of going around the table and saying what you are thankful for.
I hope you practice the tradition of going around the table and saying what you are thankful for.
Mercutio
Fatwah on Western Digital
I am not a religious person, Will. As such there are very few holidays that I celebrate. Thanksgiving is pretty much my "big" holiday. Usually I spend a bit of time contemplating my navel on the equinoxes and perhaps new years' day, but other than that I don't put a lot of value on special days or times of year.
Will Rickards
Storage Is My Life
Being thankful does not require one to be religious or believe in God (which are separate things entirely but let us not get off topic), only to have something to be thankful for, which you now seem to have. And it is a nice bonding type tradition in 'family' situations. It is all about opportunites to share a moment with loved ones. <insert cute hallmark slogan here>
Mercutio
Fatwah on Western Digital
Well, I'm about to be off to the first party I've been to in... well, if you don't count things that were entirely made up of relatives, my first party ever.
I've met many of Amy and Kim's friends individually at one time or other, but there will be a lot of people I do not know. It has been impressed upon me that my company will be appreciated regardless. Probably because I'm the only one who really knows how to work their AV setup.
I've taken a couple pepcid tablets and some herbal something-or-other that's supposed to keep me calm.
I don't know why I'm so nervous. I can always leave. New experience, I guess.
I've met many of Amy and Kim's friends individually at one time or other, but there will be a lot of people I do not know. It has been impressed upon me that my company will be appreciated regardless. Probably because I'm the only one who really knows how to work their AV setup.
I've taken a couple pepcid tablets and some herbal something-or-other that's supposed to keep me calm.
I don't know why I'm so nervous. I can always leave. New experience, I guess.
The JoJo
Wannabe Storage Freak
ROCK ON Merc!
Try to enjoy yourself! And try to relax! 8)
Try to enjoy yourself! And try to relax! 8)
The JoJo
Wannabe Storage Freak
And GOOD LUCK!
Just remember, you're the MAN!
Just remember, you're the MAN!
mubs
Storage? I am Storage!
Sound advice from JoJo. Relax. Enjoy. Be yourself. I think the girls want you for more than the AV stuff. Have fun!
Groltz
My demeaning user rank is
...And leave the bow tie at home, bro.
:wink:
:wink:
ddrueding
Fixture
Best of luck. I've always been nervous going into groups of people. The only time I can relax is when I'm going to a Tango dance (called a milonga) because I know I bring something to the table (they think I'm pretty good). Otherwise I would be feeling quite stupid sitting somewhere near the bar (my other party skill).
I'm sure you'll do fine, as long as you relax and just be yourself. You don't need to get along with everyone, so long as they understand where you're coming from.
I'm sure you'll do fine, as long as you relax and just be yourself. You don't need to get along with everyone, so long as they understand where you're coming from.
e_dawg
Storage Freak
Play on, playa! Interested to hear how it went.
In any event, alcohol is your friend. There's no party a few gin and tonics won't help with. (disclaimer: some parties may be so bad that an improvement on what may be perceived as medieval torture may only rise to the level of "root canal" post gin)
Interested to hear how it went. In any event, alcohol is your friend. There's no party a few gin and tonics won't help with. (disclaimer: some parties may be so bad that an improvement on what may be perceived as medieval torture may only rise to the level of "root canal" post gin)
e_dawg
Storage Freak
LunarMist said:Yeah, a PPI and an extra layer of deodorant never hurts.
No, no. PPI's take too long to work. You want an H2 blocker instead.
Mercutio
Fatwah on Western Digital
I'm sure I accomplished something, since I didn't get home until 4:00...
Unfortunately, most of what I accomplished consisted of impressing on a large number of drunken gay women that I'd make a good girlfriend for someone if only there wasn't the obvious problem of my gender.
It was a highly bizarre experience and probably not within the representative sample for festive social gatherings, but I guess it was entertaining to watch.
Unfortunately, most of what I accomplished consisted of impressing on a large number of drunken gay women that I'd make a good girlfriend for someone if only there wasn't the obvious problem of my gender.
It was a highly bizarre experience and probably not within the representative sample for festive social gatherings, but I guess it was entertaining to watch.
The JoJo
Wannabe Storage Freak
Did YOU like it? Did you enjoy the party?
mubs
Storage? I am Storage!
So Merc, you're not the anti-social / asocial person you claim to be, after all
Mercutio
Fatwah on Western Digital
Pbbt.
Actually, what ended up happening was that those of us who are introverts formed a group distinct from the main party. Personally, I did a lot of cleaning, food prep and general running around in between showing off the AV gear and MAME system. The distractions made things a lot easier to deal with.
Actually, what ended up happening was that those of us who are introverts formed a group distinct from the main party. Personally, I did a lot of cleaning, food prep and general running around in between showing off the AV gear and MAME system. The distractions made things a lot easier to deal with.
Tea
Storage? I am Storage!
Nahhhh ..... Good for you. Merc the Party Monster!!! Whoohoo!
Hey, the problem with parties, speaking in general, is that .... mmmm .... no, Tannin is probably better suited to make that point. I'll just add that it is important to think of parties as a thing where you go along and do whatever it is you feel comfortable doing.
Some of us feel that this means drinkinhg lots and dancing on the tables. Many people seem to think that this is the only thing you should do at a party. These people are, of course, quite wrong. We only listen to them because these are the people who happen to have the loudest voices. They are, essentially, incredibly boring people who we only notice because they talk so loud.
Nope, parties are for doing what you feel comfortable doing.
If this means fiddling with the sound system and organising some great food, hey, go for it! (In fact, Tannin and I feel the same way. Well, on the food front at any rate. Cooking and serving for lots of people is fun. And if you like to play with A/V gear, that's good too. Most of the other things we can do at a party are, franky, pretty boring.
Hey, the problem with parties, speaking in general, is that .... mmmm .... no, Tannin is probably better suited to make that point. I'll just add that it is important to think of parties as a thing where you go along and do whatever it is you feel comfortable doing.
Some of us feel that this means drinkinhg lots and dancing on the tables. Many people seem to think that this is the only thing you should do at a party. These people are, of course, quite wrong. We only listen to them because these are the people who happen to have the loudest voices. They are, essentially, incredibly boring people who we only notice because they talk so loud.
Nope, parties are for doing what you feel comfortable doing.
If this means fiddling with the sound system and organising some great food, hey, go for it! (In fact, Tannin and I feel the same way. Well, on the food front at any rate. Cooking and serving for lots of people is fun. And if you like to play with A/V gear, that's good too. Most of the other things we can do at a party are, franky, pretty boring.
ddrueding
Fixture
Congratulatons Merc, sounds like you had a good time. If you've got a bunch of lesbians thinking of you as girlfriend material, you'll have plenty of luck with the straight ones...they're less particular in my opinion, and by definition are more interested
Tannin
Storage? I am Storage!
Tea threatened that I would have something to say on this theme a few posts and a couple of days ago.
Parties are horrible things a lot of the time. It isn't that there is anything wrong with the idea of a party as such, rather, it's that in the vast majority of cases, the majority of other people at the party are people that, when it's all said and done, you don't particlarly like. I'm not saying that there is anything wrong with these people, or that you don't get along with them perfectly well, just that 95% of the people you meet at the average party are people you really have nothing much in common with and talk to out of politeness more than genuine interest.
So you float around feeling like a fool because all the brainless (er, sorry, make that "differently interested" instead of "brainless") party people, and wind up having a really hard time thinking of anything to say to them. In the end, you either find a quiet corner and get into a good conversation with somebody interesting (if you are lucky) or, more frequently, wind up running out of sensible things to say to these people that you don't particularly get on a wavelength with, so you say some stupid things instead, and live to regret it.
(So, Tannin, how many of those "stupid" people you meet at parties and don't like are actually rather nice people who have, like you, simply run out of sensible things to say to people they don't particularly know or like and are - like you - now saying stupid things which they will live to regret?)
(Good question, Tea. Your point seems to be that one should not rush to judge. I'll try to bear that in mind in future.)
Or else, having nothing more interesting to do but feeling the need for some activity, you drink more than is good for you, and allow the evening to progress (regress?) from there.
Finally, parties are nearly always dominated by loud music. Now don't get me wrong, I like music, and if it's good music, I like it loud. (Scratch an old rock and roller.) (Or scratch a concert goer who really, really likes small halls and doesn't much like to see (e.g.) Mozart in the vast emptiness of Hamer Hall (the main Melbourne concert hall) because it's just not loud enough. In a big hall, anything less than 100-odd musicians is a bit underwhelming.)
But I don't like trying to mix music and conversation. Doesn't work. OK, some people are really tuned in to body language and various other visual cues when they talk to one another. I ain't. I tune into auditory cues. Always have. This is why I sell so many computers on the telephone: it doesn't worry me in the slightest that I can't see the other person, I can learn all I need to know from their phrasing, timing, tone of voice. And I don't miss visual cues in the slightest, because I never see them anyway, not even when I'm talking face-to-face.
But put me in a room full of people and loud music, and I become a social cripple. I can't communicate. I can't figure out what people are communicating to me. You might as well put me in a room of people who all speak Hindustani. (In fact, I'd do better: I might not understand any of the words, but I'd soon figure out the other stuff, that 70% of human communication which (psychologists tell us) is non-verbal.)
This is why I don't like parties.
(Unless I'm doing something I like. Such as cook. Or play bass guitar.)
What if the party was all people I actually liked? People I thought were really interesting? Hmmmm ...... Never been to a party like that. But then, most of the people I like don't usually go to parties.
Finally, parties happen on weekends. Nearly always, it's a Friday night or a Saturday night. Nine Friday nights out of ten, I'm on the road heading for some wildlife. Nine Saturday nights out of ten, I'm looking up at the stars and having one more cup of tea before I turn the lantern out and roll over and pull the tarp up over my head because tommorow is another day and I want to be up in time to hear the first bird call.
(Tannin, you know what?)
(Nope. What?)
(You are off-topic.)
(I'm practically always off-topic, Tea.)
(Yes, but this might be a good time to stop and post in some other thread instead.)
(You are probably right. I think I'll do that.)
(Now Tannin.)
(OK)
Parties are horrible things a lot of the time. It isn't that there is anything wrong with the idea of a party as such, rather, it's that in the vast majority of cases, the majority of other people at the party are people that, when it's all said and done, you don't particlarly like. I'm not saying that there is anything wrong with these people, or that you don't get along with them perfectly well, just that 95% of the people you meet at the average party are people you really have nothing much in common with and talk to out of politeness more than genuine interest.
So you float around feeling like a fool because all the brainless (er, sorry, make that "differently interested" instead of "brainless") party people, and wind up having a really hard time thinking of anything to say to them. In the end, you either find a quiet corner and get into a good conversation with somebody interesting (if you are lucky) or, more frequently, wind up running out of sensible things to say to these people that you don't particularly get on a wavelength with, so you say some stupid things instead, and live to regret it.
(So, Tannin, how many of those "stupid" people you meet at parties and don't like are actually rather nice people who have, like you, simply run out of sensible things to say to people they don't particularly know or like and are - like you - now saying stupid things which they will live to regret?)
(Good question, Tea. Your point seems to be that one should not rush to judge. I'll try to bear that in mind in future.)
Or else, having nothing more interesting to do but feeling the need for some activity, you drink more than is good for you, and allow the evening to progress (regress?) from there.
Finally, parties are nearly always dominated by loud music. Now don't get me wrong, I like music, and if it's good music, I like it loud. (Scratch an old rock and roller.) (Or scratch a concert goer who really, really likes small halls and doesn't much like to see (e.g.) Mozart in the vast emptiness of Hamer Hall (the main Melbourne concert hall) because it's just not loud enough. In a big hall, anything less than 100-odd musicians is a bit underwhelming.)
But I don't like trying to mix music and conversation. Doesn't work. OK, some people are really tuned in to body language and various other visual cues when they talk to one another. I ain't. I tune into auditory cues. Always have. This is why I sell so many computers on the telephone: it doesn't worry me in the slightest that I can't see the other person, I can learn all I need to know from their phrasing, timing, tone of voice. And I don't miss visual cues in the slightest, because I never see them anyway, not even when I'm talking face-to-face.
But put me in a room full of people and loud music, and I become a social cripple. I can't communicate. I can't figure out what people are communicating to me. You might as well put me in a room of people who all speak Hindustani. (In fact, I'd do better: I might not understand any of the words, but I'd soon figure out the other stuff, that 70% of human communication which (psychologists tell us) is non-verbal.)
This is why I don't like parties.
(Unless I'm doing something I like. Such as cook. Or play bass guitar.)
What if the party was all people I actually liked? People I thought were really interesting? Hmmmm ...... Never been to a party like that. But then, most of the people I like don't usually go to parties.
Finally, parties happen on weekends. Nearly always, it's a Friday night or a Saturday night. Nine Friday nights out of ten, I'm on the road heading for some wildlife. Nine Saturday nights out of ten, I'm looking up at the stars and having one more cup of tea before I turn the lantern out and roll over and pull the tarp up over my head because tommorow is another day and I want to be up in time to hear the first bird call.
(Tannin, you know what?)
(Nope. What?)
(You are off-topic.)
(I'm practically always off-topic, Tea.)
(Yes, but this might be a good time to stop and post in some other thread instead.)
(You are probably right. I think I'll do that.)
(Now Tannin.)
(OK)
Tannin
Storage? I am Storage!
Look, just one more thing. Would you rather go to a party and met girls?
Or go somewhere else and do this?
I know who I'd rather meet.
Or go somewhere else and do this?
I know who I'd rather meet.
Tannin
Storage? I am Storage!
Oh yes, LM. Two reasons: first, it's a crop from a larger original. I'd have needed 800mm or more to get nothing but the bird in frame. (I could have done it with the digiscope (~2500mm in 35mm equivalent terms) but didn't have it with me, and would probably not have got it set up fast enough to get the shot. This is maybe half or a third of the original.
Second, I like the context. She is gathering nesting material from last year's thistles, and the thistles are important for that reason, and also just because they make nice shapes. And the green background is nice too. An unusual colour for Australian bush, it's usually brown, but this is springtime and the winter grass is still fresh.
Thirdly (out of my two reasons, but probably most important) I like the diagonals, the two upward lines made by the thistle stalks, and the clash of the crossing-over diagonal line suggested by the bird.
Oh, and fourth, I get really bored with bird-right-in-the-centre-of-the-image shots.
I probably just broke about 7 rules of good composition just now, but there you go.
On the AF points, I've more-or-less settled on using the centre point all the time, unless I have bags of time to get the shot, which you almost never do with small birds. OK, that's not ideal, but (the way I'm thinking at present) it's better to get the shot and maybe crop later than it is to buggerise about trying to remember where you have the autofocus set at the moment and possibly selecting a different spot and most likely confusing yourself and getting some really nicely focussed leaves and a blurry bird.
Later on, as I gain proficiency, I expect I'll vary that more. But for now, it's a nice simple method, and (a thing that helps) much the same method I'm used to using with the digiscoping rig. (I set the A95 to spot focus, it defaults to the centre, and you can move it by pressing "set" and then wagglig the joystick. Very similar to the 20D, really.)
Back to composition again: I just read a fair whack of the basic rules last night and ... well .... didn't really take to them too well. As soon as the author started talking about compositional elements in terms of the emotions they invoke I went into fade-out. I do the same thing when people start saying how Hayden's shift into b minor in the second movement is "tragic", whereas the reentry of the clarinet just before the coda is "joyous". It gets worse when people analyse Shostakovich note by note for his political intent. It's music for God's sake. If he'd wanted to write about politics he would have used paper with different sorts of lines on it. Music is supposed to sound nice. Photographs are supposed to look nice.
("Nice <> "pretty", of course. At least not always. No-one would describe Shostakovich as "pretty". In fact, that's one of the great things about Shostakovich: he does things just because he likes the way the orchestra sounds.) I almost certainly have better shots of that same bird, but I haven't had time to pick them out yet. This one will do for now.
(Tannin!)
Oops. You are right, Tea. Now I'm way off-topic. Sorry about your thread Merc.
Second, I like the context. She is gathering nesting material from last year's thistles, and the thistles are important for that reason, and also just because they make nice shapes. And the green background is nice too. An unusual colour for Australian bush, it's usually brown, but this is springtime and the winter grass is still fresh.
Thirdly (out of my two reasons, but probably most important) I like the diagonals, the two upward lines made by the thistle stalks, and the clash of the crossing-over diagonal line suggested by the bird.
Oh, and fourth, I get really bored with bird-right-in-the-centre-of-the-image shots.
I probably just broke about 7 rules of good composition just now, but there you go.
On the AF points, I've more-or-less settled on using the centre point all the time, unless I have bags of time to get the shot, which you almost never do with small birds. OK, that's not ideal, but (the way I'm thinking at present) it's better to get the shot and maybe crop later than it is to buggerise about trying to remember where you have the autofocus set at the moment and possibly selecting a different spot and most likely confusing yourself and getting some really nicely focussed leaves and a blurry bird.
Later on, as I gain proficiency, I expect I'll vary that more. But for now, it's a nice simple method, and (a thing that helps) much the same method I'm used to using with the digiscoping rig. (I set the A95 to spot focus, it defaults to the centre, and you can move it by pressing "set" and then wagglig the joystick. Very similar to the 20D, really.)
Back to composition again: I just read a fair whack of the basic rules last night and ... well .... didn't really take to them too well. As soon as the author started talking about compositional elements in terms of the emotions they invoke I went into fade-out. I do the same thing when people start saying how Hayden's shift into b minor in the second movement is "tragic", whereas the reentry of the clarinet just before the coda is "joyous". It gets worse when people analyse Shostakovich note by note for his political intent. It's music for God's sake. If he'd wanted to write about politics he would have used paper with different sorts of lines on it. Music is supposed to sound nice. Photographs are supposed to look nice.
("Nice <> "pretty", of course. At least not always. No-one would describe Shostakovich as "pretty". In fact, that's one of the great things about Shostakovich: he does things just because he likes the way the orchestra sounds.) I almost certainly have better shots of that same bird, but I haven't had time to pick them out yet. This one will do for now.
(Tannin!)
Oops. You are right, Tea. Now I'm way off-topic. Sorry about your thread Merc.
Mercutio
Fatwah on Western Digital
I think we can forgive you, as the pontificating performed in your previous post seems particularly perceptive.
Personally, I didn't go to a party to meet anyone. I went to a party because my friends impressed on me that my company and my help would be appreciated.
Fortunately, my chosen role didn't require much unscripted speech. I saw the social butterflies do their thing, and I don't know how they manage it.
Personally, I didn't go to a party to meet anyone. I went to a party because my friends impressed on me that my company and my help would be appreciated.
Fortunately, my chosen role didn't require much unscripted speech. I saw the social butterflies do their thing, and I don't know how they manage it.
e_dawg
Storage Freak
Yes, I see what you're saying, but let's consider that parties may not be so different from wildlife photography after all.
For example, like you said, sometimes one goes to parties to meet girls. If you do meet a wonderful girl, then that party immediately doesn't suck. And if you happen to get her number, ask her out, start dating, and then have an enjoyable relationship of some sort, then it makes up for all the lame parties you went to recently. That hope for the big payoff is what keeps people coming back for more. Now, you may perceive the return on effort to be insufficient for the ultimate payoff, but others would say that about wildlife photography, cooking, etc.
You see, it doesn't matter what your pursuit is. It could be wildlife photography where you spend hours waiting, trekking, taking shot after average shot and sometimes you just don't get the shot you're looking for... It could be golf, where you're slicing the ball into the adjacent fairway or playing out of the sand and the rough more than the fairway... Wine... Cooking... Computer games... Programming... you name it...
When you get that perfect shot of a mistletoe bird... when you hit that perfect drive that lands 5 feet from the hole... when you discover that magical Shiraz that makes you want to buy a case before they run out of that vintage... when your souffle is just *perfect* for the first time ever... when you finish C&C Red Alert 2 for the first time at 5:30 AM after staying up all night... when you unleash some wicked programming kung-fu to come up with a brilliant solution to finish your program...
... it feels so very satisfying that the journey was worth it. In fact, you could say that the journey itself made the payoff that much more enjoyable.
For example, like you said, sometimes one goes to parties to meet girls. If you do meet a wonderful girl, then that party immediately doesn't suck. And if you happen to get her number, ask her out, start dating, and then have an enjoyable relationship of some sort, then it makes up for all the lame parties you went to recently. That hope for the big payoff is what keeps people coming back for more. Now, you may perceive the return on effort to be insufficient for the ultimate payoff, but others would say that about wildlife photography, cooking, etc.
You see, it doesn't matter what your pursuit is. It could be wildlife photography where you spend hours waiting, trekking, taking shot after average shot and sometimes you just don't get the shot you're looking for... It could be golf, where you're slicing the ball into the adjacent fairway or playing out of the sand and the rough more than the fairway... Wine... Cooking... Computer games... Programming... you name it...
When you get that perfect shot of a mistletoe bird... when you hit that perfect drive that lands 5 feet from the hole... when you discover that magical Shiraz that makes you want to buy a case before they run out of that vintage... when your souffle is just *perfect* for the first time ever... when you finish C&C Red Alert 2 for the first time at 5:30 AM after staying up all night... when you unleash some wicked programming kung-fu to come up with a brilliant solution to finish your program...
... it feels so very satisfying that the journey was worth it. In fact, you could say that the journey itself made the payoff that much more enjoyable.
ddrueding
Fixture
Wow, very well said e_dawg. I love metaphors...
Tannin
Storage? I am Storage!
(Tannin?)
(Mmmm?)
(Seems to me that our friend the doggy one is getting very philisophical today, eloquent even. Great posts.)
(I agree, small hairy one. But he's wrong.)
(Huh?)
(You don't go to parties to meet girls. trust me on this, I've met any number of wonderful girls over the years, but met precisely none of them at parties.)
(Nonsense. What about CS or NL?)
(You've been looking at my scrapbook, you sneaky tart!)
(So? What about CS and NL?)
(OK, I met both those two at parties, but I said wonderful girls. And they were merely nice, not utterly fantastic. Well, OK, NL was pretty amazing if you like that sort of thing and can stand the pace, but then I didn't actually meet her at a party, now that I think about it. For some reason I can't remember, a mutual friend arranged for me to pick her up from school on the way home because we lived close by and it was on my way, more-or-less.)
(What sort of school, Tannin?)
(Primary school. Why do you ask?)
(And how old were you?)
(26. 28. Something like that.)
(What!? You horrible cradle-snatcher! How old was she then? 11?)
(No, you fool. She was teaching there. She was about 20 or 22. Stupid ape. Anyway, I didn't meet her at a party.)
(So? Your point is?)
(You go to parties, at least if you have any brains, you go to parties just to enjoy the party. Full stop. That's it. Don't go to a party "just in case you meet someone", cause it ruins the party, and anyway chances are you won't. You meet wonderful girls all sorts of other ways. At parties, you only meet duds. Well, mostly.)
(That, Tannin, is just not true.)
(Yes it is.)
(Nope. You only think that because you are a social cripple as soon as anyone turns the music up)
(Gahhh. Nonsense.)
(Is it nonsense?)
(I dunno. Maybe.)
Stupid human.)
(Mmmm?)
(Seems to me that our friend the doggy one is getting very philisophical today, eloquent even. Great posts.)
(I agree, small hairy one. But he's wrong.)
(Huh?)
(You don't go to parties to meet girls. trust me on this, I've met any number of wonderful girls over the years, but met precisely none of them at parties.)
(Nonsense. What about CS or NL?)
(You've been looking at my scrapbook, you sneaky tart!)
(So? What about CS and NL?)
(OK, I met both those two at parties, but I said wonderful girls. And they were merely nice, not utterly fantastic. Well, OK, NL was pretty amazing if you like that sort of thing and can stand the pace, but then I didn't actually meet her at a party, now that I think about it. For some reason I can't remember, a mutual friend arranged for me to pick her up from school on the way home because we lived close by and it was on my way, more-or-less.)
(What sort of school, Tannin?)
(Primary school. Why do you ask?)
(And how old were you?)
(26. 28. Something like that.)
(What!? You horrible cradle-snatcher! How old was she then? 11?)
(No, you fool. She was teaching there. She was about 20 or 22. Stupid ape. Anyway, I didn't meet her at a party.)
(So? Your point is?)
(You go to parties, at least if you have any brains, you go to parties just to enjoy the party. Full stop. That's it. Don't go to a party "just in case you meet someone", cause it ruins the party, and anyway chances are you won't. You meet wonderful girls all sorts of other ways. At parties, you only meet duds. Well, mostly.)
(That, Tannin, is just not true.)
(Yes it is.)
(Nope. You only think that because you are a social cripple as soon as anyone turns the music up)
(Gahhh. Nonsense.)
(Is it nonsense?)
(I dunno. Maybe.)
Stupid human.)
e_dawg
Storage Freak
There are many different types of parties, my friend. Some are for meeting girls, some are not. You can be selective and strategic about this kind of thing, you know ...
In any event, you can go to parties for more than one reason. And if there are no wonderful girls to meet even if that was one of your original objectives of that particular party, then so be it. You can meet somebody else who can turn out to be a good friend, or even somebody who is a partner of convenience for one of your hobbies. For example, if you want to play cricket, and you can't find any teams or don't know anybody in your area, you might just meet a silly mid off who's looking for a keeper... or something like that. You know what I mean.
You usually get something out of a party... it could be something as small as a tip about a great new restaurant that you wind up taking a date to a couple months later... And it happens to be a perfect date. One shouldn't be so myopic or narrow-minded about the many ways to enjoy yourself or to get something out of the evening.
The funny thing about interpersonal interactions is that it can often be a self-fulfilling prophecy. If you have a negative attitude going into a party and think you're not going to meet anybody interesting there, it usually turns out to be true. Social interaction takes an investment from both parties. If you're not going to put forth your best effort, neither will the other party. You're not going to be able to control how the other party is going to act, but if you're always doing your part, that's half the battle right there.
...In any event, you can go to parties for more than one reason. And if there are no wonderful girls to meet even if that was one of your original objectives of that particular party, then so be it. You can meet somebody else who can turn out to be a good friend, or even somebody who is a partner of convenience for one of your hobbies. For example, if you want to play cricket, and you can't find any teams or don't know anybody in your area, you might just meet a silly mid off who's looking for a keeper... or something like that. You know what I mean.
You usually get something out of a party... it could be something as small as a tip about a great new restaurant that you wind up taking a date to a couple months later... And it happens to be a perfect date. One shouldn't be so myopic or narrow-minded about the many ways to enjoy yourself or to get something out of the evening.
The funny thing about interpersonal interactions is that it can often be a self-fulfilling prophecy. If you have a negative attitude going into a party and think you're not going to meet anybody interesting there, it usually turns out to be true. Social interaction takes an investment from both parties. If you're not going to put forth your best effort, neither will the other party. You're not going to be able to control how the other party is going to act, but if you're always doing your part, that's half the battle right there.