Thursday evening I accompanied a buddy to our friendly, neighbourhood Future Shop for moral and tactical support (to fend off the incessant machine-gun high-pressure up-selling attempts of the commissioned employees) while he purchased a new HP laptop, model (uh, lemme check....) dv2412ca. His most demanding application will be staying awake during late night webcam chats, so I figured that as long as he buys up an extended warranty he'll be OK with pretty much anything in the low end because they're all complete shite, anyway.
I took it straight back home with me, figuring that It would be easier and faster for me to set it up here than to sit on the phone for three hours with him while he freaked out trying to navigate through the first-boot insanity. This would be my first intimate experience with Vista.
The machine, itself, is typical enough of any 14.1" "shallow-screen" (props, Tannin) mass-market beater: really shiny and sporting an array of marketing double-speak stickers. I plugged it in at 11p.m. and let it charge while I went out. I got back at 4 a.m. (don't ask... or do) and fired it up for the first time. Thankfully I had the presence of mind to take notes shortly after hitting the power switch (read: lightly tapping the power button). They go something like this:
• It's been nearly two minutes since I powered on. Nothing's happening yet.
• Something's happening.
• Some sort of configuration.
• More configuration Have to type some stuff in
• Restart or two
• 15 minutes have elapsed since pressing the power button and I'm seeing what appears to be the Vista desktop.
• Still can't do anything
• Multiple and simultaneous messages and windows appear: "Welcome to HP!" "Welcome to Vista!" "You're so lucky to own an HP lapptop with Vista!" "User experience!" "User experience!" "Experience! Experience!"
• Can move the pointer around on screen but clicks don't register yet
• System tray notification appears: "Check your computer security: There are multiple security problems with your computer. Click this notification to fix these problems." Huh? I just turned you on for the first time and already there's a problem?
• Now every preinstalled value-added application wants to update. Simultaneously. Norton. Windows. HP. Java, etc. Total sensory overload, but hey, the computer must know what it wants to do so I'd better listen and agree to all the updates.
• "Cannot connect to the internet" chime six applications in unison. "Error! Error!"
• Oh, well, look at that... the hardware 'wireless' switch is in the "off" position by default. Good thing I know to check, because the setup pamphlet doesn't mention it.
• Now I'm online. Click through all the warnings and mass update continues.
• Updating more or less done. Time elapsed: about 40 minutes.
• A couple of reboots more and I'm at the desktop again. Norton is all in my face.
• This thing boots slower than XP.
• Introducing User Account Control.
• Over an hour after first pressing the power button and updates and warnings are starting to subside.
• Have seen User Account Control about 6 times in the last 20 minutes.
• Turned off all eye candy - immediate, enormous sense of relief.
• Time to uninstall Norton and all the other value-added sludge.
Now, I'm capable of navigating these waters, but I'm in the minority. How can someone of average computer savvy deal with this kind of onslaught? I'm trying to find the right words to express the experience. Overwhelming. Insanity. High-pressure. Stress-inducing. Convoluted. Those are pretty close.
Contrast this with turning on a Mac for the first time and you have to wonder how companies like HP continue to sell computers.
I just don't understand.
Piyono
I took it straight back home with me, figuring that It would be easier and faster for me to set it up here than to sit on the phone for three hours with him while he freaked out trying to navigate through the first-boot insanity. This would be my first intimate experience with Vista.
The machine, itself, is typical enough of any 14.1" "shallow-screen" (props, Tannin) mass-market beater: really shiny and sporting an array of marketing double-speak stickers. I plugged it in at 11p.m. and let it charge while I went out. I got back at 4 a.m. (don't ask... or do) and fired it up for the first time. Thankfully I had the presence of mind to take notes shortly after hitting the power switch (read: lightly tapping the power button). They go something like this:
• It's been nearly two minutes since I powered on. Nothing's happening yet.
• Something's happening.
• Some sort of configuration.
• More configuration Have to type some stuff in
• Restart or two
• 15 minutes have elapsed since pressing the power button and I'm seeing what appears to be the Vista desktop.
• Still can't do anything
• Multiple and simultaneous messages and windows appear: "Welcome to HP!" "Welcome to Vista!" "You're so lucky to own an HP lapptop with Vista!" "User experience!" "User experience!" "Experience! Experience!"
• Can move the pointer around on screen but clicks don't register yet
• System tray notification appears: "Check your computer security: There are multiple security problems with your computer. Click this notification to fix these problems." Huh? I just turned you on for the first time and already there's a problem?
• Now every preinstalled value-added application wants to update. Simultaneously. Norton. Windows. HP. Java, etc. Total sensory overload, but hey, the computer must know what it wants to do so I'd better listen and agree to all the updates.
• "Cannot connect to the internet" chime six applications in unison. "Error! Error!"
• Oh, well, look at that... the hardware 'wireless' switch is in the "off" position by default. Good thing I know to check, because the setup pamphlet doesn't mention it.
• Now I'm online. Click through all the warnings and mass update continues.
• Updating more or less done. Time elapsed: about 40 minutes.
• A couple of reboots more and I'm at the desktop again. Norton is all in my face.
• This thing boots slower than XP.
• Introducing User Account Control.
• Over an hour after first pressing the power button and updates and warnings are starting to subside.
• Have seen User Account Control about 6 times in the last 20 minutes.
• Turned off all eye candy - immediate, enormous sense of relief.
• Time to uninstall Norton and all the other value-added sludge.
Now, I'm capable of navigating these waters, but I'm in the minority. How can someone of average computer savvy deal with this kind of onslaught? I'm trying to find the right words to express the experience. Overwhelming. Insanity. High-pressure. Stress-inducing. Convoluted. Those are pretty close.
Contrast this with turning on a Mac for the first time and you have to wonder how companies like HP continue to sell computers.
I just don't understand.
Piyono
