Well, I have 31 years of interactions with women to go by, and so far I got nothin'.
Here's the ideal that I'm looking for in a lady:
1. A geek - these are about as common as unicorns as far as I can tell, but the girls who like comic books or dungeons and dragons or hard drives are the awesomest girls. I've only ever met one who is straight.
2. More outgoing and upbeat than I am - this should not be hard, since I am the least outgoing and upbeat person in the world.
3. Kinda tomboyish - Not big on makeup, more handy around the house than I am (I suck at that stuff).
4. More interested in man-parts than my ex was - Honestly, this is negotiable; I don't know the difference anyway.
5. No kids - not negotiable. I don't want them. I don't want to be around them. vhemt.org and all that.
6. Some kind of real intellect - An education, the ability to hold a conversation. Very important.
7. Not terribly materialistic - Golddigging bad (not that I have much gold, but compared to people who live where I do...)
8. Friend first.
9. Not religious.
10. Not a total bitch. I am OK with very large levels of aggressive/assertive etc. I don't mind that at all really. On the other hand, there is a line, and about the time you feel your testes shrivel up when some guy's wife/girlfriend tells him to do something, you know that line.
11. Some concept of personal hygiene.
Now, to me, none of that looks unreasonable.
At the same time, it also looks utterly impossible. That person does not exist. If she does, I have no way to find her, and it's reasonable to assume that no person I might meet in my normal life matches those criteria, based on life experience.
Assuming I did find that person, it's entirely reasonable to assume that she's already found a guy who is probably better than I am for whatever categories represent HER ideals; observation suggests that women more or less have their pick of male-types and that even the testicle-shriveling total bitches have a steady stream of guys in their lives.
In short, I don't know what the point is. I wish I knew of a straight, available, ideal sort of woman, but I don't, nor do I have any hope of ever finding one, so all any activity on that front does is increase the level of frustration, depression and isolation I feel.